Saturday, February 26, 2011

6 Animals That Altered History Forever

There have been plenty of memorable animals throughout the ages. While most of these animals may simply be known for their television prowess or amazing adorable-ness, a few have actually helped sculpt and shape the course of history. Below are six of these animals.

6 The Black Rat Brings the Black Death
black death rat 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverThough no one single rat can be singled out for starting the Black Plague, the sheer destruction caused by this collective animal family is enough to ensure their place on this list. Taking place during the 14th century, the Black Death is widely known as the worst pandemic in human history. Estimates suggest that 30 to 60 percent of Europe’s population was wiped out by the disease. Though unknown at the time, the lowly black rat played an integral role in spreading the disease (as it is believed Oriental rat fleas were the source of disease transmission). If not for the hearty rat, today’s human population would be exponentially larger.


5 Jim the Disease-Curing Horse
jim horse 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverWhile the entire species of black rats may have scarred the karma of the animal kingdom, a single milk wagon horse by the name of Jim helped bring them back into our good graces. At the turn of the 20th century, diphtheria was a fatal and highly contagious disease that was ravaging much of the world. Sadly, old Jim would eventually come down with the disease. However, before his owner could put him out of his misery, the lucky horse somehow got better. Science intervened to help us humans cultivate diphtheria antitoxins from the wonder horse and quickly develop a cure for the illness.

4 Dolly the Cloned Sheep
dolly sheep 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverBack in 1996, Dolly proved that cloning of mammals was possible. Cloned from a singular cell taken from a mammary gland (FYI, Dolly is named after Dolly Parton because of the country singer’s memorable mammaries), Dolly helped prove that an entire living being could be recreated simply by using a cell taken from a specific part of the body. Though practical uses for cloning are still on the horizon, it is without a doubt this intrepid domestic sheep will help shape medical science for years to come.

3 Ham – First Chimp in Space
space chimp ham 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverIf it wasn’t for Ham the chimpanzee, we humans may never have had the cajones to launch ourselves into outer space. Much as our chimpanzee brethren first walked on this earth before us, so too did they first journey into the final frontier. In early 1961, at the ripe old age of four years old, Ham became the first hominid to be launched into outer space. Though his flight was only 16 minutes and 39 seconds long, his ability to burst through the stratosphere provided the direct confidence necessary to shoot a human being (Alan Shepard) into outer space later that year.

2 Napoleon’s Newfoundland
newfoundland 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverThe Battle of Waterloo is one of the most famous battles in all of history. However, it likely would never have occurred if not for the actions of a Newfoundland dog. You see, after escaping from exile on the island of Elba, Napoleon set sail to reclaim his lost territories in a murderous blood rage. However, during this trip, it is said that he was thrown overboard and would have certainly died if not for the fact that the unnamed Newfoundland leaped into the briny depths to save him. Such heroic water extractions are a common occurrence among the Newfoundland breed -– a fact that helps add credibility to this otherwise unverified historical fact.

1 The Monkey Attack on Alexander I
Alexander I of Greece 135x95 6 animals that altered history foreverWay back in 1920, King Alexander I of Greece was taking his pet dog for a leisurely stroll through the Royal Gardens. Suddenly, two monkeys came out of nowhere and threatened to attack poor Alexander’s beloved pet. Attempting to fight off the crazed moneys, Alexander was bit in the ensuing exchange. From this monkey bite, Alexander soon died of sepsis.
His death caused the return of his father, Constantine, to the throne. Since Constantine had allied with Germans in WWI, this caused France and Britain to back out of aiding in Greece’s attack on the Ottoman Empire. As a result, around 250 thousand Greek soldiers were killed in ensuing battles and Turkey proved once and for all to be the big dog on the Ottoman campus.

Source: guyism

The 5 Dumbest Criminals Who Were Foiled By Facebook

5 Poked into Prison
poke 135x95 The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by FacebookA Tennessee woman has been jailed for poking someone, unfortunately not the first charge of a new “Stop being such a waste of time” law. Shannon Jackson decided that the always-wrong “the internet isn’t real” attitude applied to restraining orders which say “Absolutely no communication of any kind.” She was prosecutably wrong.
It’s easy to see her mistake; a poke doesn’t communicate any useful information, so she thought it didn’t count. But it does communicate annoyance, as well as “I’m absolutely worthless, can’t think of anything to say other than I want to bother you, and in this case am clinically incapable of understanding legal instructions.” She was arrested and is now awaiting a court appearance which could land her up to a year in jail.


4 The Spam King
spam king 135x95 The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by FacebookIf you’ve ever been redirected to an uncloseable pop-under spam-sex-and-gambling site you’ve already met Sanford Wallace. So you’ll be pleased to know he might end up in jail – where unwanted intrusions into your personal space are far more pressing and Assblaster Jake doesn’t ask “Are you sure you want to quit?”. Facebook has won a judgment of almost quarter of a billion dollars against him and Online Turbo Merchant*, and since he knows how to abuse systems with codes – he’s already filed for bankruptcy – they’re also prosecuting him for contempt of court to put him behind bars.
*The name of his company, and the absolute best way to describe an internet masturbator we’ve ever heard.
The contempt charge dates back to a 2006 conviction where he was ordered to pay one point seven five million dollars but got out of it by – no shit – saying “I can’t pay that, honest.” Try that next time you get fined. They were instead ordered never to hack peoples’ computers again which, considering how that was already illegal the first time they did it, was like dropping a lion off at the playground and sternly saying “No repeat of last time!” in sign language.

3 Burglar Is: In Your House!
jonathan parker burglar 135x95 The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by FacebookIt’s important to log out when you’re using a shared computer, especially when the owner doesn’t know they’re sharing it. It’s even more important when that’s because you’ve broken into their house to steal three thousand dollars worth of diamond rings. In fact it moves past “important” and into “Write it on the back of your hand underneath the reminder to breathe.”
Pennsylvanian Jonathan Parker apparently didn’t have any marker left that night, or was busy sniffing them, leaving his account page open on a computer in the house he’d just burgled. This raises a number of important questions, like “How did somebody that dumb learn how to read?”

2 Gun Crime
gun dick 135x95 The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by FacebookScumbag stupidity doesn’t just save police time, it even employs them: Police in England are advertising for a “Gang Enforcement Team Researcher” who’ll be paid thirty thousand dollars a year to send idiots online to jail. We’d do it for free, especially when it’s second-amendment-screwing samples like this:
Even better, he lives in a country without that action-packed amendment so this photo alone was enough to jail him. It proves he can’t even be trusted with a choice of pants, let alone a shotgun.

1 Escaped to Mexico, Facebooked to Jail
maxi sopo facebook 135x95 The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by FacebookMaxi Sopo had, as well as an unfortunately tampon-style name, pulled off an actual classic criminal escape. After conning Seattle banks for hundreds of thousands of dollars he drove to Mexico before authorities could catch up with him, and there spent his ill-gotten gains on an apartment and a party lifestyle in Cancun’s nightclubs. How do we – and the Justice Department – know this? Because he added them on Facebook and told them.
Maxi added another Cancun clubber to his Facebook friends list, apparently under the impression that no-one connected with justice ever enjoys themselves in any way. When the official realized that he’d been status-messaged by an escaped felon he assisted in a spectacular sting operation leading to an explosive final showdown on a luxury yacht. No, wait, he just asked “Where do you live?” and Maxi told him. Police become involved shortly thereafter.

Source:  guyism